Elsa's Phantom
by OrangeGalen
Summary: (Pre-Frozen)Elsa had figured it would be a matter of time. First she started talking out loud, then she started talking to her reflection in the mirror. So it was reasonable that she would create an imaginary person to talk to. Now she only needs to decide if the person she sees is as imaginary as she first thought, or actually real...
1. New Years Eve

**Sigh. When I first joined this site, I had planed to never write a Frozen fan fiction. Then I started reading them. Then my brain started coming up with new ideas to write about. Then I started writing them. This is the product of _one_ of those ideas (yes there are multiple, one is out already). So here I am writing a Frozen fan fiction, one of several now. Anyway, I think that's enough self depreciation on my part. I am really liking this story though already, even though it's all in my head...**

**This chapter is the first one, but it's sort of like a prologue, but not really. It just has that feel. **

**Just a fair warning, this story will be slow to update. It's just how I am. Sorry. **

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**Disclaimer: I do not own Frozen. **

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_Painful, the heart will be_

_When it learns,_

_That it can never yearn,_

_For the touch of another soul,_

_Even if it could be remade whole._

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_Shattered, the mind will be,_

_When it understands,_

_Nothing can touch your hands,_

_And that in saving another's life,_

_It will bring nothing but strife._

"The Cost of Safety" Part 1-  
by Galen Cook (aka OrangeGalen)

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Four years.

Four years since the ballroom accident.

Four years since she last saw her sister.

Four years since she last had kind physical contact with another person other than her father and mother.

Elsa leaned against the windowsill, looking out through the glass, her gentle breathing fogging up what little view she had left. Frost was creeping along the bottom edges of the window in frozen fractal patterns, creating a quiet crinkling sound every few minutes, and for once it wasn't her fault from losing control. The frost was completely natural, caused by Mother Nature's seasons.

_I know that the world rotates and moves around the sun, and that's what causes the day to become night, and for the seasons to change, and for the years to pass, _Elsa thought_, And I watch them all from this window as they pass by, unable to do anything about it. I wish everyday that I could change like the seasons; then maybe I won't have to worry about hurting anybody with my... my curse._

It was the dead middle of winter in Arendelle; New Years Eve to be exact, and snow was falling outside piling up in decent sized drifts, faster than they could be cleared away. Not that anybody minded right then. A white blanket covered the town, making the streets and rooftops glitter like diamonds in the moonlight. For the citizens of Arendelle, every footstep they took outside caused the ground to crunch like a fresh stack of crackers from the fresh powder of snow and ice.

As Elsa continued to look out the window, she could see little black dots that were people moving around further in the city across the bridge that led to the castle. Other _normal_ people were out enjoying the snow, enjoying the wintertime, enjoying each other's company without worrying about anything. Couples walked hand in hand underneath the lanterns that lined the roads, looking into the shops for gifts to give each other or just enjoying the sights. Children were frolicking around throwing snowballs at each other or building snowmen in the short time they had left before their parents called them in to bed.

She remembered a time like that, when she and Anna had fun in the snow.

When her father's voice used to be stern but friendly and caring at the same time.

But that was before _that_ night…

Elsa blinked away sudden tears and laid her head against the cold window, not caring about the rapidly freezing glass, and sighed deeply in misery. The coldness in her heart more than made up for the difference in temperature, not that she cared anyway.

Four years.

Four years since she almost killed her sister.

Four years since she went into a forced self-isolation.

Four years since she had a friend to talk to, to play with, to build a snowman with.

It had been a hard four years for Elsa. The only people she's seen were her select few tutors for her education and her parents who taught her how to behave, think, and act like a queen, since she was next in line for the Arendelle throne. A few all too brief hours were all that she had outside her room; a few hours a day with her tutors to learn everything before she deliberately shut herself back into her room to protect the world from herself. She actually considered that time to be lucky, that she was able to conceal her curse for that long without freezing a table, without causing a snowstorm inside a room.

Without hurting anybody else.

As a distraction, she dove into her studies as a blessed relief as a way to help keep her mind off the curse. She shined in all her subjects: mathematics, science, languages, everything, and her tutors phrased her for her progress, claiming that she would outsmart them at one point if she continued at her current pace. She was only getting better.

Her parents publicly insisted to the limited staff that she would make an excellent queen someday. She excelled in etiquette and manners, grasped the concepts of relations with other nations easily, and for all appearances was a shrewd diplomat if need be. She memorized important documents, and knew most of Arendelle's history by heart.

But she knew it was all an act, and she knew her parents knew that as well, especially her father. The façade she put on for her tutors evaporated the moment she was alone back in her room. Once alone all her fears of losing what seemed to be a diminishing amount of control came back to her stronger than ever. As she got older, she could feel the magic, the curse, getting stronger, more powerful. When she was alone, which was the majority of each and every day, it took all of her willpower and a tight reign on her emotions to prevent the frost from growing beneath her feet as she endlessly paced. Some days were better than others and she could almost enjoy being with her parents, her tutors.

But her fear gnawed on, ever hungry in the back of her mind. Alone, she often huddled in a corner of her room or in her bed as she tried to fight it. She closed her eyes and tried to block out the growing feeling of cold growing in he room, pretending it wasn't there, wishing that it would go away. But when she could _feel_ the frost spreading across the floor, the room becoming colder, icicles forming on her bedposts, she curled upon herself even more and repeated her personal mantra.

Even when she gave the appearance of utmost attention to her tutors, there was a part of her that overrode everything else, chanting to herself in a repeating rhythm, an endless drum beat, of commands, of orders that were said by both her father and herself: _Conceal, don't feel. Conceal, don't feel. Conceal, don't feel._

Sometimes she thought she almost had it. Thought that she had found a way to control it. Sometimes she would go hours without worrying about her curse and actually let herself _feel_ something.

Then her father would knock on the door and come in…

Then the ice would spread and grow and grow for as long as he was in there.

Then he would leave and Elsa would either go back to her corner or tare into her studies, depending on whether how strong she felt after he left.

On these days, she sometimes caught herself talking to her reflection in the mirror. Starved of real human contact, of a human voice in all the hours and days spent inside her isolation to actually have a conversation with, other than the droning voices of her tutor's lessons or her father's 'reprimands', she started talking to herself. Then she would realize it was only her reflection and stop.

She started when she was ten. Two years after _that _night she started saying little comments, such as, "where did I put that," or "there must be something else to do," usually only to herself. Comments that we all make from time to time. But as more and more years went by, she started saying full sentences out loud, just to hear a voice. Then she would hold conversations in her mind, sometimes only doing half the conversation and then pause, waiting for a voice, a response that would never come before continuing on.

Then, one day, she was passing by her full-length mirror and saw her reflection. It was the first time in a while that she actually _looked_ at herself. She was a young teenager and her body was showing the changes with her growing bust and widening hips. She was actually quite shocked to see that she looked like a normal human being, something that could pass as an ordinary person. Then she saw her eyes in the reflection and just for a moment, pretended that her reflection was somebody different and started talking, an endless stream of thoughts that came to mind, and she just said them out loud and only stopped when she heard footsteps from a servant bringing her evening meal outside her door.

As days went by, she started having full conversations with her reflection, answering her own questions and replying back like she was talking to another person, one that would not look at her like an abomination, like a monster.

She would talk, all the while wishing that it would talk back, that it would answer with something she didn't know. All the while wishing that it were Anna she was talking to, and not her own reflection.

Anna had her pictures in the gallery; Elsa had her mirror in her room.

Four years.

Four years since she first heard her new life motto.

Four years of closed gates and closed doors.

Four years of ignoring the voices on the other side of her frost covered door.

Elsa looked up again and saw a group of people in the town center dancing to an inaudible melody, happy and carefree. A large group had gathered and as Elsa watched, she could almost imagine the sounds of the music, the cheering of the people, and the applause after the musicians were finished. Currently she could see only a single person wrapped in a cloak playing the fiddle in the center, or was it the violin? Elsa didn't know the difference, as it wasn't part of her studies to learn music. When she was younger she used to play the piano with her mother, but after she accidentally froze the last piano she was barred from learning any more and the pianos were thrown out of the castle. Anything that she learned had been forgotten in the following years.

After a few minutes of watching, the soloist bowed finishing their song and crowd broke up cheering and retiring for the night.

_It's been so long since we had a concert in the castle,_ Elsa thought, _it would be nice to hear music from an orchestra again, or a soloist, or even singing. It would be nice to be around people without worrying that I might hurt them. But that can't happen. That can never happen. I always need to be alone. _

Elsa sighed again and withdrew herself from the window ledge. She was twelve now, and needed to stop focusing on childish daydreams… or so her father said. He yelled at her once when he found her with a "pointless fantasy book" when she should have been studying. It took the rest of the day for the ice to melt.

She wandered over to the other side of her room and picked up a book without looking at it from the bookcase. _It's probably either a mathematical or historical book or some story or another with heroes who always win, villains who are constantly beaten, and the princesses always getting saved. I've read them all, several times. I've had time to._

_All too much time alone in my room fighting my curse. _

She sat down on her bed and gently opened the book at the beginning. _Of course it would be this one, _she thought, _the one where the prince fights a dragon to save a princess from a curse laid upon her._ Elsa gave a sullen chuckle at the irony. _The only differences are that there is no prince, no dragon, and my curse is all-natural. And there is no hope of me getting saved from it. _

She closed the book, slamming it shut, and fell against her bed in an un-princess like manner. _Why? Why did it have to be me? The daughter of a King? The one who will inherit the throne in time? Anybody else could probably control this curse, but not me. I can't control it, I can't contain it, and the only reason it's concealed is because _I_ am. It keeps getting stronger. I can't be around anyone. I could hurt them like I did to Anna _that_ night. I could kill them. I'll be labeled as a… a monster like father keeps telling me I will be. Because that is what I am really: a monster. I need to be alone for other people's sakes. _

The window started to frost over, this time from the inside. And the growing frost wasn't confined to the window. The floor started to become white and glittery, and the ice started traveling up the walls. Elsa sat up and noticed that the book she was gripping had almost been completely covered in ice. She gasped and dropped the book on the floor and it landed with a loud _crunch_ing sound. Elsa brought up her knees and curled up on her bed, rocking back and forth in despair. _Even with the gloves it's not enough. It's getting stronger. I can't control it. _She looked at the ice on the walls, pleading, _Please, please; just go away, _she thought, panic starting to overcome her.

She remembered a few hours ago how her father came in to 'check up' on her, and to make a few things clear…

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_(Flashback)_

_Elsa was almost in the same position at the window, looking out over Arendelle. The sun hadn't set yet so Elsa could see the entire city glowing with an orange light. The sky was a brilliant array of yellow, pink, and orange, lighting up the world and the snow still leftover from last night's deposit. The sun had almost gone down, but Elsa looked on, waiting for it to disappear. _

Tonight will be New Year's Eve! That means I can have a fresh start, another year to learn how to control my powers… _Elsa paused, _no, my curse. Father says it's not a curse, but I can see the lie in his eyes. He knows that it's a curse. He just doesn't say it.

_She sighed and moved away from the window, taking a seat at her desk and reading her Latin language book. Since it was the holidays, her tutors were currently on leave from the castle, leaving Elsa to read up on future lessons for when they came back, although Elsa wouldn't blame them for leaving if they knew the truth about her. _

_There was a knock on her door, signaling whom it was before Elsa even heard them, or him in this case, speak. There were only two people that knocked like that: the servants or her father. She stood up and cleared out her throat, "Enter." She said quickly, remembering one time when she had a break down and said "no" to her father. He didn't take kindly to that at all. _

_The door opened and Elsa's father, the King of Arendelle was inside her room in a second, closing the door behind him, to prevent anyone passing by from seeing inside the room that held the royal family of Arendelle's greatest secret. _

_"Hello Elsa." He said softly. _

_"Hello Father." She responded, fighting to keep her head level and eyes up instead of glancing at the ground. Once she had actually started training for the throne, her father broke her of that habit quickly. In more ways than one. _

_Her father gave a passing glance over the room that in any other company could have passed for a casual one-over. But Elsa knew what he was looking for: any evidence of her powers gone out of control, an excuse to go off on her again._

Well he won't find any,_ Elsa thought a little smugly, then squashed the emotion, as it was unbecoming of a princess. But she had been extra careful to keep her curse under control today and had succeeded in doing so. The room hadn't even gotten cold. _

_Her father finished his inspection and there was a strange look on his face when he didn't find anything. Was it relief, or disappointment? "As you know, today is New Year's Eve. A new year to start again." He said. _

_"Yes, I am aware of that." _

_Her father was silent for a moment longer and looked out Elsa's window, hands behind his back in a regal pose. He seemed lost in thought as he looked out onto the fjord. Then he said, "I remember coming into this room last year this time and finding it coated with ice. I was most displeased." _

_Elsa's face betrayed nothing that was going on in her mind. She still remembered the voice that sounded so unlike her father but still came from his mouth. It terrified her. _

_"So I'm pleasantly surprised that this time your room isn't covered in your… powers." He said, pausing thinking of an appropriate word. _

_"I've been trying to keep it under control, and I think it's getting better." Elsa said hesitantly. _

_"No," The King said sharply, making Elsa flinch, "don't make it better, make it perfect. You're growing older and the sooner you can control your powers, the sooner you can be free of them." He took a breath, "It's the start of a new year, Elsa. I want this year to be perfect. No ice, no snow, no frost. Not even a dip in temperature because if there is, then I know you still don't have control. Then I'll have to do something about it." _

_Elsa shivered, not from any cold except the coldness in her father's voice. _

_"I'll… I'll see what I can do." Elsa said, hiding the fear in her voice. _

_Her father turned to look at her, and they gazed at each other in silence, before he gave a small smile and said, "That's all I ask for." He turned to leave and just as he was about to open the door, he said, "I love you Elsa, I hope you know that." _

_Elsa smiled as well and said, "I know, and I love you too." _

_Then the door closed and Elsa tried to get back to her studies, unaware or deliberately ignoring the slight coating of frost that covered the floor where she stood a few seconds ago. _

_(End Flashback)_

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_Please, please go away_, Elsa thought. The ice started growing again, faster in it's pace. It was almost halfway up the wallpaper by now and showed no signs of stopping, no signs of hearing Elsa's pleas. She curled up on herself even more, closing her eyes, wishing that the ice would go away. _Conceal it, don't feel it. Don't let it show. _

Suddenly there was a different sound. A sound other than the slight crackling of ice meeting the wooden floorboards. A sound that made Elsa's eyes shoot open with both happiness and dread.

_*Knock knock kno-knock knock. * _

_No,_ she thought in despair, _not now. Not now, why now? Please not now. _

_"Elsa?"_ Came a slightly muffled voice on the other side of the closed door. It was a young girl's voice, around the age of nine, full of perkiness and a tiny bit of hope that her sister, who had been hiding for four years, will finally come out of her room, that in the first time in forever the closed door will open and the two will see each other.

_No, please, don't start Anna,_ Elsa thought. _It kills me every time I have to do this to you._

But her pleas never left her silent mouth, never were heard outside her own mind. Anna on the other hand, went along with what she wanted to say, oblivious to Elsa's torment.

_~"Do you wanna build a snowman?  
__And pass the time away till night?  
__I want to stay awake  
__Let's give ourselves a break  
__We need to reunite!_

_I wish you were here with me  
__To wait for next year  
__It's only a few hours away._

_Do you wanna build a snowman?  
__It doesn't have to be a snowman…"~_

Anna's voice became more muffled on that last line when Elsa knew that she pressed her mouth against the keyhole, like she had done years ago.

Elsa scrunched up her face, trying to keep her tears from streaming down her cheeks. She had to say this next part, no matter what it cost her, no matter how much it hurt.

"Go away Anna!"

There was silence on the other side of the door, then a dejected, _"Okay, bye…"_

Quiet footsteps retreated from the door, almost inaudible, but Elsa heard each one, and each one felt like a hammer beating Elsa's heart into a pulp. Elsa couldn't hold it in anymore, she cried. All her torn emotions poured out through her tears. She cried to have to torture Anna like this. She cried because she couldn't control her curse. She cried because she was all alone. And finally she cried because she had nobody. Nobody to talk to, nobody to comfort her, nobody that could look at her without fear. Nobody.

Frost and ice completely covered the room, regardless of her will, regardless of her father's veiled threats.

Four years.

Four years since she held Anna's hand.

Four years since they laughed and played together.

Four years of forcing Anna away for her own good.

Elsa cried herself to sleep that night on New Years Eve.

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**Well, that's the beginning of Elsa's Phantom. Like it? Please let me know so I can continue with this. In the future there will be a not-so-subtle crossover. It's just enough so that I can say it is, but not close enough to warrant this to be put in the crossover section. I'll leave you to guess what the crossover will be... **

**You probably have it figured out, don't you... (*grumble grumble*)**

**Anyway, if you liked it please, Read, Review, Favorite, and Follow! (R.R.F.F) for short.**

**Until then**

**-OrangeGalen**


	2. Auld Lang Syne

**Hello there! This is the second chapter of Elsa's Phantom! Thank you to all who decided to give this story a chance, and for the ones that are going to, what are you waiting for?! Hee-hee...**

**Anyway, enjoy!**

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**Disclaimer: I do not own Frozen**

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_Tormented, the body will be,_

_When it always feels,_

_But does everything to conceal,_

_And lets itself dissolve due to fear,_

_When nothing could be more clear._

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_ Destroyed, the person will be,_

_When everything cracks,_

_After learning these facts,_

_And that their world is left broken,_

_That even a plea must be unspoken._

"The Cost of Safety" Part 2-  
by Galen Cook (aka OrangeGalen)

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_"Hang on!"_

_"Catch me!"_

_"Gotcha!" _

_"Again!"_

_"Wait!"_

_"He-he-he!"_

_"Slow Down!"_

No not this again. No.

_"Whoooo!" _

_"ANNA!" _

_I watch as Anna gets struck by my ice powers and falls down, deathly still. _

_ "Anna?" _She has to be okay. All that happened was she got hit in the head. She's okay. She has to be.

_I rush over, stricken, but some part of me knows that she will be okay. Part of her hair will turn white any moment now. That everything will be right again. _

_But it didn't. Anna's hair stayed the solid red it always used to be. As I cradled Anna, I noticed that her fingertips were turning blue and white, and frost started covering her. _No this isn't what's supposed to happen. This _isn't_ what happened. She got hit in the head. It was just her head. I couldn't have…

_The frost crept upwards from her hands and started covering her arms, then her dress. _

No. No. No. No.

_"Momma! Papa!" I shout in desperation. _Please get to us in time.

_"You're okay Anna, I got you."_ _Her body is becoming stiff from the ice, and for once I notice the cold. It felt as if something was creeping across me, uncomfortable. What scares me the most though is that the cold is coming from Anna, and I can feel it off of her. _No she's supposed to be the warm one; she has to be okay.

_Frost and ice spreads around me, covering the entire hall with a layer of ice. The snowman the two just built a few minutes ago falls apart, an adequate metaphor for the future. _

Please, no. No.

_Anna continues to freeze. I see the ice creep up her neck and soon it is over her cheeks. _

This isn't supposed to happen. This isn't what happens. What did I do?

_There is a pounding on the door of the hall, but the ice is too thick and is preventing the people from getting inside._ Please.

_Anna stirs in my arms, and for a brief moment, I think that she is going to be fine. _She has to be.

_But suddenly her hair turns completely white and she stiffens. Her entire body turns to ice. Cold ice. Solid ice. Clear ice. Ice where there once was a little girl. _

No, no, no, no, no!

_"Anna? Please wake up. Wake up!"_

This isn't supposed to happen!

_"ANNA!" _

_The ice statue releases its last breath in a fog, and then everything is silent. _

Nonononononono!

_My parents finally break through the door, the hinges completely frozen and break apart, causing the doors to crash down, echoing in the hall._ _"Elsa, what have you done!?" _

_I look up at my mother and father, tears in my eyes. "It was an accident! I'm sorry Anna." I cradle Anna's statue in my arms hoping that she becomes real again. She's like a crystal, and it would have been beautiful if I didn't know that it was a person a few seconds ago. _

_"Anna's dead. You killed her." _

_I look up wondering whose voice that was. My father is looking down at me, and I recoil from the look in his eyes. They have flames in them, and he's looking at me. "No, I couldn't have. I didn't mean…"_

_"She's dead because of you Elsa." This was my mom now, the same tone my dad had. "You couldn't keep it under control. Now look what's happened!" _

_"Anna…"_ Nononononononono!

_"How could you!?"_ _My father roared causing me to let go of Anna's ice statue and crawl backwards along the floor in fear. It landed with a audible thump and rocked slightly unbalanced. He advanced towards me and I kept backing up _"_How could you kill your own sister? How could you be our daughter? You're not! You're not a human; a human doesn't kill their own sister! You're a freak, a monster!"_

_Just then I realized that he was right. I just killed by own sister. Not my powers, I did. Me. Elsa. My powers only helped me, tempted me. They had nothing yet everything to do with this. It was true, I am a freak. I am a monster._

_"Monster."_

_Monster._

Monster.

Monster!

MONSTER!

**MONSTER!**

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

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Elsa bolted upright in her bed, griping her sheets, screaming. Damp, cold sweat stuck to her forehead, making it even clammier than before. She gasped for breath, swallowing in the precious air that her body thought it needed. Slowly, she came to realize that she was still inside her room and not the ballroom like _that_ night. That didn't bring her much comfort as she noticed her room covered in ice, glittering ominously in the moonlight. The walls, the floor and even the bed were frosted over, a consequence of her nightmare.

Elsa had to sigh with some relief that it was just her room, and nobody else was there for her to hurt, to see, but then she realized what would her father do if he found out. She lay back on her pillow, staring at the top of her bed cover, trying to not think. For all intents and purposes, she was dead to the world. No doubt that there was some part of her that wished it was a reality.

A few minutes, or it could have been a few hours, passed without her having any success controlling her emotions. Eventually she gave up, and got up. She walked over to her mirror, making gentle crunching sounds when her feet made contact with the icy floor, the ice thin enough that a little pressure would break it.

The mirror thankfully wasn't frosted over too badly so she could see her reflection. Elsa could see herself, the frost clinging to the gold engraved edges spreading out like little spider webs over the reflective surface.

Elsa started to talk.

"Well I look terrible." She said to herself, or to her reflection. _Better start with humor to get things rolling._

"That's because I had that nightmare again."

"I can't stop them. I keep playing _that_ night over and over in my head. What am I supposed to do?"

"Conceal it, don't feel it. Don't let it show." She said.

"I keep hearing that, but what does that mean?" Elsa, or the non-reflection Elsa, asked. "How is that supposed to work?"

"If I don't feel, then I can conceal my curse so they don't show."

Elsa started pacing in front of the mirror, crunching the ice beneath her. "I know that, and I try to follow it as best as I can, but I'm afraid. I don't want to hurt anybody." Unconsciously she clutched her gloved hands to her sides.

"All the more reason to not feel. I shut myself in here for a reason, to keep myself away from… from Anna, to keep her safe until I can control my curse."

"But it's not being controlled, it's getting worse. I can't touch anything without my gloves otherwise it freezes. I can't control it."

"Then being in here is the next best thing. In here, if I don't let them in, then nobody gets hurt."

"Yes, it's for the best. I need to stay in here. "

"Be the good girl, you always have to be."

Elsa straightened up and looked at herself in the mirror. "Even if it hurts Anna, it's for the best." _To keep her safe. To keep everybody safe. _

_I wish that it only didn't hurt _me_ so much._

With her not so internal conversation finished she just looked into the mirror in silence, staring at herself. No sounds could be heard in the castle. It was dead silent.

**_BONG!_**

Elsa jumped when a loud noise sounded in her room.

**_BONG!_**

She looked around for the source of it.

**_BONG!_**

She realized that the sound was coming from her grandfather clock in the corner of her room.

**_BONG! _**

Strangely it wasn't covered in ice, but that only registered after a moment before she realized something else.

**_BONG! _**

_Oh, it must be midnight, _she realized, _the start of the New Year._

**_BONG! _**

_The start of another year of hiding. _

**_BONG! _**

_The start of another year of isolation. _

**_BONG! _**

_Another year of loneliness._

**_BONG! _**

_Another year of avoiding Anna…_

**_BONG!_**

_I wonder if she's awake now…_

**_BONG! _**

_"The sky's awake…"_ She remembered from _that _night.

**BONG!**

Elsa let the last bell tone ring out. There was silence for a moment before she heard another sound, the sound of distant servants and maids singing. Curious, she put her head against the floorboards and listened to the song for a while. Faintly she heard:

_~"Should auld acquaintance be forgot,  
__And never brought to mind?  
__Should auld acquaintance be forgot,  
__And auld lang syne?_

_For auld lang syne, my dear,  
__For auld lang syne,  
__We'll take a cup of kindness yet,  
__For auld lang syne._

_And there's a hand my trusty friend!  
__And give me a hand o' thine!  
__And we'll take a right good-will draught,  
__For auld lang syne._

_For auld lang syne, my dear,  
__For auld lang syne,  
__We'll take a cup of kindness yet,  
__For auld lang syne."~_

The song ended and Elsa eventually straightened up from her crouching position. She yawned, realizing that she was still sleepy but hesitant to climb back into her bed for fear of her nightmares returning. But as the minutes went by, she resigned herself to the inevitable and slowly went over and got back inside the sheets, brushing off some of the ice. Sighing once more, she laid her head back on her pillow and tried to sleep, closing her eyes.

She just got comfortable when she heard another sound: a voice singing. It was a rich male tenor that seemed to pour emotion out with just a few notes and lyrics. The voice seemed to be singing to himself, but Elsa caught the words, words that she heard a few minutes ago.

~"For auld lang syne, my dear,  
For auld lang syne,  
We'll take a cup of kindness yet,  
For auld lang syne."~

It was a beautiful voice, producing a sound that Elsa never thought any voice could make. Every note was spot on and in perfect pitch. It was a voice that could belong to an angel. It was almost enough to lull Elsa asleep by itself. But there was just one problem.

The voice was too close for comfort in a supposedly empty room.

Realizing this fact, Elsa opened her eyes and shot upright in her bed. There, looking out the window, sitting on her windowsill inside her room, was a man! Her eyes widened as she took him in. He was sitting in profile to her, highlighted against the moonlight, making him seem to glow with an internal light. His trousers were black and he had one leg up on the windowsill and the other hanging towards the ground. A long black cape with a silver lining hid the rest of his body from sight, almost reaching the floor. His hair was one of the most interesting things about him. It was short, reaching to the back of his neck and slicked back, shining in the moonlight, and it looked like to be a mix of two colors: orange at the roots and black from the middle till the ends, giving him a look of a tiger.

A million different questions raced through Elsa's mind, but she finally stammered out the two most important. Or the two most prominent in her mind.

"Wh-who are you? How did you get in here?" Her voice shook from fear, fear of this stranger, and fear of hurting him. _Get out before I hurt you… whether I mean to or not… I can't control it… _she wanted to tell him.

The man didn't look at her, or react at all, continuing to stare out into the wintery night. Elsa's fears started to get out of hand again, her control slipping, the room being frosted in a second layer. But as Elsa was about to say something again, warning him about her curse, he stirred. Moving his head, he turned to look at her. Elsa gasped, as she saw his eyes. _They're an icy blue, like mine,_ Elsa thought. If possible they were even brighter than hers, shining with an unseen internal light, hidden passion.

They looked at each other for a moment in silence, neither one moving. The frost stopped its movement, holding still in anticipation. Even the night seemed to pause, waiting for what was about to happen. Then the man did something unexpected.

He smirked.

Smirked.

He _smirked!_

Elsa didn't know what to make of it. _Why is he _smirking_? Does he not see the ice around the room, what I am, what I can do to him? Why is he here?_ The man's reaction was so unwhat Elsa expected that she didn't understand it.

Before she could voice any of her questions, the man vanished, like a puff of mist, into the air, disappearing. One moment he was there, the next, he was gone.

_Poof._

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Songs used: _"Auld Lang Syne"_- written by Robert Burns

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**And that's it for now. Who is this mysterious person Elsa just saw? Why did he come there in the first place? Find out!**

**As always (R.R.F.F)**

**-OrangeGalen**


	3. Dreams

**Hello readers! It's time for another update today! And more good news: after a few weeks working at camp (9 to be exact) I'm finally going home today! Yay! Sleeping in is fun. **

**Now back to the chapter. Last time, Elsa had a nightmare where she hit her sister in the head and killed her this time. After waking up, she was awake to hear the new year roll along. However she wasn't alone as a mysterious figure was in her room. But then he vanished!**

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**Disclaimer: I do not own Frozen**

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_Are dreams just that: dreams? Or are they flashes of reality breaking through the illusion? _

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Elsa blinked. She rubbed her eyes with her gloved hands and looked at the window again. _He's gone! What?_

She was seriously confused. _There was a man. Right there. In my room. And he just vanished! _Finally collecting herself, Elsa shot up from her bed and rushed over to the spot where she saw the man in the cape sitting. The windowsill was covered with her ice and frost except for two spots: one was small and in the shape of a boot print, the other was larger from where the man was sitting.

Elsa was thoroughly confused putting it mildly. _How? What? I don't… Huh? _She couldn't make a complete question; her mind was racing so much, trying to make sense of what she just saw. _He was right here! How did he? Who? What? I'm confused. _

Elsa clutched her head and groaned. _I can't deal with this right now,_ was her first coherent thought. It was well after midnight, she had been forcefully woken up by a nightmare, and now was confused as all get-out right now, so naturally her mind couldn't comprehend anything big or complex at that moment.

_There was somebody in my room._ Suddenly, that broke through the fog Elsa had in her mind. _There was somebody. In. My. Room!_ A rush of emotions came through Elsa that moment; anger at having her personal space, her domain, invaded, suspicion as to how he got in in the first place without anyone noticing, fear of her curse being discovered, and last, probably the strangest… curiosity. _Just who was he? Why was he here? _

Elsa shook her head and stared out the window again. Arendelle was empty; nobody was out on the streets or dancing at this time of night. They were either asleep or celebrating the New Year with rambunctious parties, but all were inside taking shelter from the cold of winter. The snow still glowed white on the buildings, faintly sparkling in the moonlight.

For a moment, Elsa thought that she would see this mysterious man that had been in her room, crossing some road or stalking the streets like a wraith or a ghost, but she saw nothing except snow and shadows. There was a fresh layer of snow powder on the ground, smoothing out previous footprints. It remained unmarred; nobody has stepped out and there were no footprints to be seen of her mysterious visitor.

_He just disappeared, like mist in the wind!_ Elsa was still going over the man's sudden disappearance. She looked away from the window and found herself drawn to her mirror, and stared at her reflection once again. "Nobody can do that, not even me with my curse!" She said out loud. "How can he do that?"

Elsa shrugged, and so did her reflection. "Of course how do I know if he was even a man? He could be a spirit for all I know."

"Maybe he is a ghost!" She said in shock.

"Maybe he has a curse like me!" She thought in wonder.

Elsa's mind started racing at that, "If he does have a curse, maybe he knows how to help me control mine, or get rid of it entirely!"

"That is, if he was real." Elsa stopped her overthinking brain at that thought.

"I- I didn't think about that…" She said.

There was a pause. "I think I'm afraid that I might be seeing things, that's why I didn't consider that thought. Seeing a man appear in my room who couldn't possibly be there in the first place and suddenly disappear like that isn't exactly considered to be mentally stable."

The two Elsa's turned to face one another, or the real Elsa faced the mirror. A moment passed before she said, "Well, after all, I _am_ talking to my reflection. Who's to say that that man wasn't in my head as well?"

Elsa stopped talking, suddenly depressed. "God, I think I'm going crazy. Seeing imaginary people, talking to my reflection, what's next?"

"No, stop thinking like that," Elsa commanded herself. "I can't think like that, who will know what will happen. Conceal, don't feel. Conceal, _don't _feel. Put on the mask and shove it aside. Can't let it show."

Elsa walked away and looked out the window again, trying to reign in her over imagining brain. Her gloves stayed wrapped around her body, cradling herself, as one would do when they would hold a baby. The sky still remained dark, with the full moon shining brightly overhead. Elsa sighed again. Normally, the snow and night made her feel comforted and relaxed, but this night seemed to make her feel the opposite. Now she was more anxious than ever before.

She yawned suddenly, the action itself and sudden drowsiness that followed taking her by surprise. _Huh. I guess I'm more tired than I thought. Well it _is_ past midnight._ She turned away from the window with the full intent of going back to her bed, no matter the state it was in.

As she made her way over towards her bed, the room started getting darker and her feet felt heavier. Her eyelids drooped and her head started swimming in circles and she couldn't tell if the bed was getting closer or not. The world spun around and Elsa fell onto her bed. The last thing she saw before she lost consciousness was her reflection in the mirror standing, staring at her.

Then blackness.

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Elsa slowly felt awareness come to her. She sighed and opened her eyes, then shot up in surprise. She was in the middle of a great hall. It was darkened as there were only a few torches lit, the rest looked like they had been smothered intentionally. Elsa sat up confusedly, and then noticed that she was still wearing her sleepwear. _Why am I in my nightgown?_ She thought, then, _Is that really the most important question I should be asking right now? I think that a question like "how did I get here," or "where am I" is more appropriate. _

Elsa looked around the hall and couldn't make out much. There was a sole window high up that illuminated the hall with the glow of a big full moon, but it barely made a difference in the darkness. There were no people, no banners, nothing. The darkness hugged everything like a mist.

It was then that Elsa noticed that it was cold in here. Though it didn't bother her, she could still feel it. She looked down and saw that there was a thin layer of ice covering the floor. She looked at her hands and saw her gloves were nowhere to be seen. _No no no no no! Not again! Go away! _She thought, believing her curse had gotten out of hand again. She curled in on herself in one of her natural defensive positions.

But then realized that she didn't make the ice; she didn't feel any of her cold leaving her and this ice was too smooth and clear, unlike her normal ice she made which was jagged, chaotic, and opaque.

_Or_, she thought in some part of her mind, _like my ice before _that_ night_.

She eventually gathered her courage and uncurled herself. Standing up, Elsa looked around again trying to see anything, but the darkness made it so that she couldn't see more than twenty feet in any direction. The ice floor held no problem for her, making her thank her curse for once. She started walking forward through the hall.

As she walked, she started having an odd feeling of Déjà-vu. _Why does this place feel so familiar? I feel like I've been here before, but I don't recognize it at all. Either that or it's different. _

"So good of you to join me dearie." A female voice rung out making Elsa stop dead, "I was wondering if I was ever going to see you at some point, but patience pays off eventually."

Elsa looked around and tried to see where to voice was coming from. Just ahead of her, there was a shroud of darkness that was deeper than anything that covered the rest of the hall. Elsa could just barely make out a sitting figure in the fog. Something about the whole thing made Elsa feel disturbed on a personal level. "Wh-who are you?" Elsa asked, suddenly feeling intimidated.

There was a melodious chuckle, one that once had been pretty but was now corrupted by time, and then the voice spoke out again. "I am someone who is closer to you than you can imagine. And I know you quite well, _Elsa_ dearie." She hissed. "I should anyway."

"How do you know me?" Elsa asked, trying to keep the nervousness from showing in her voice, but not fooling anybody.

"Oh dearie, everybody knows who you _were_. The isolated princess with a curse of ice in her heart who killed her sister in, pun intended, cold blood."

Elsa's eyes widened in shock, "How do you know about that." She asked, in a barely audible whisper. Only a few people knew about what happened that night, and none of them would betray her father's trust. Then she thought and said, "And I didn't kill her! She's fine now." She drew some courage from the thought of her sister still living, breathing, and warm.

The woman chuckled again. "Oh is she now? My tenses must be mixed up. It's hard keeping track of everything sometimes. At this point it is 'you _almost _killed your sister.'" The woman's answer confused Elsa, but there was something about it that chilled Elsa to the bone more than any ice could.

"And to answer your question, you'll find that I know more about you than you know yourself." The woman continued. There was a poignant pause as Elsa felt like she was being scanned with unseen eyes, "Including your lack of control."

Elsa looked down and saw that this time it was her ice that was spreading from her bare feet. Her eyes widened with panic. _No! Keep it together, hold it in. _

_"Conceal, don't feel." _

Elsa looked back up towards the darkness in surprise. Both Elsa and the unseen woman had just muttered the same thing. "What?" Elsa said.

The figure's voice dripped with barely concealed venom. "Like I said, I know more about you than you do yourself."

The ice Elsa was unconsciously making started creeping up her legs. Before she could move, the ice froze her feet in place to the floor. Elsa tried to break out of it, whimpering slightly, but like usual her curse didn't respond to her wishes and she wasn't strong enough to force her way out.

"I know about your control problems, how you can't get rid of your ice, how to can't use it like you used to. How you're _afraid_. I can help you with your problem dearie." Her voice dropped down to a whisper, inviting Elsa to listen. The figure leaned forward a bit from her position; not enough for her face to be seen through the gloom, but enough for Elsa to see she was wearing a dress that sparkled with what little light was in the hall. It was a midnight black, darker than even the fog surrounding the woman.

Elsa's legs were frozen in ice a little past her knees now, and the ice was still growing, slowly enveloping her. "How?" Elsa asked, her voice laced with terror.

The woman leaned back into the shadows, radiating contentment. "It's simple really. I can show you how to properly use your curse, how to do magnificent and great things with it, and never live in fear again."

"How?" Elsa repeated, the ice now going up her waist.

"Give in." The woman said, catching Elsa by surprise with the answer. _What?_ "Give in to the curse. Don't hide from who you really are. Embrace who you are, or rather who you _will_ be: the future Ice Queen, Ruler of Winter. Follow my guidance and I can show you the path to _living_ again, without staying locked up in that prison you call a room, without worrying about what they're going to say about you. You would never worry or fear again."

The ice had traveled up to Elsa's chest. She _so _wanted to listen to this woman. Her solution was so simple and easy she felt stupid for not seeing it. _Stop fighting it, _a part of Elsa whispered_, it's part of you and will never leave. Use it instead of concealing it. Ignore other's advice; they can't help you, they don't understand. They never have. They don't even try. _

But there was a part of her that was still thinking rationally and made her pause at the words spoken to her. Something about them seemed… off. _Give in? What about what my father said about controlling it? I can't give in; otherwise I'll hurt everybody around me. I need to hold it in, can't let it show. _

"I… I want to, I really do." Elsa said, almost pleading with her voice, "But I can't I just can't."

"_Why?!_" The woman snarled with the most amount of anger she's shown in her voice. "Because you're worried about your father? Worried about Anna? What about yourself, what your isolation is doing to you? Face it dearie, it's destroying you faster than anything else could."

Elsa bit back a gasp as the ice reached her chin, making her barely able to talk. "I need to put duty first. I'm going to be queen eventually, and I need to do what's best." She said, trying and failing to keep a steady voice.

"So you're willing to sacrifice yourself in more ways than one so other's can be happy? You're going to let others control you like a puppet?" The woman said, almost musing to herself. Elsa heard the woman shake her head through the darkness. "You're despicable. You're killing yourself little by little and it will all be for naught in the end. I know, I have seen it. But you might not even get that far." She said as the ice finally engulfed Elsa, muffling her scream as her own ice closed over her.

Elsa couldn't move, couldn't breath, and couldn't feel anything except for mind numbing cold. For once in her life, Elsa was cold and she couldn't even shiver. But she could still see and hear through the ice for some reason. She saw the woman get up from her seat and move towards her, the darkness following the woman, still obscuring her face. It enveloped the ice block Elsa was in preventing her from seeing anything at all. Blackness was all Elsa could see.

"This is goodbye for now Elsa dearie, but I'll be back to offer my proposition when we meet again in the future. You will know me when you see me." The woman turned away and left Elsa frozen in the ice.

_Help, please!_ Elsa wanted to scream, but she couldn't. Her silent screams went unanswered, and her mind started going blank. She was terrified, more so than when she thought she killed Anna. She could hear the woman's cold laughter echo through the hall. It ate away at Elsa, echoing around until it was overwhelming and she wanted to tear out her ears. If only she could. _Help me…_

But then there was another voice, very faint but it grew stronger by the second. It was singing a simple tune, but it was the most beautiful sound Elsa could imagine at that moment. The woman even stopped her laughing and listened to it. Elsa's terror started dying down, the singing calming her. The voice seemed familiar to her.

_~"Sleep, my child, and peace attend thee, _

_All through the night. _

_Guardian angels God will send thee, _

_All through the night_

_Soft the drowsy hours are creeping, _

_Hill and dale in slumber sleeping. _

_I my loved ones' watch am keeping, _

_All through the night."~_

A light started to shine above Elsa, driving away the darkness. Elsa could feel the ice around her start melting and she became calm listening to the voice.

"No!" The woman snarled, but recoiled when the light glowed brighter and the singing became louder. As the light grew brighter, the woman vanished further into the retreating darkness. The ice melted completely, leaving Elsa free of restraint. The hall started vanishing, and Elsa felt herself being pulled away from the place, towards the voice.

_~"Angels watching, e'er around thee, _

_All through the night. _

_Midnight slumber close surround thee, _

_All through the night. _

_Soft the drowsy hours are creeping, _

_Hill and dale in slumber sleeping_

_I my loved ones' watch am keeping, _

_All through the night."~_

The song finished and the world vanished in one last burst of light.

For a second, Elsa could see an image of snowcapped mountains close in the distance. For Elsa, in one brief, blessed, moment, she felt free.

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Elsa woke up in her bed, and then after a moment, sat upright. _What was that?_ She wondered. _Was that a dream or was it real? _She could still feel the cold creeping up her body. It scared her. _I wonder if Anna felt like that when… no Elsa! Don't think about that. Don't bring that up now, not after two nightmares in a row. Or was that last one even a nightmare? It didn't seem as jumbled as dreams are, but who can tell when they're in them? _

Elsa looked at the clock on the far wall and groaned. It was only 3 in the morning, still several hours before daylight even considered coming around. She flopped back on the bed, several jumbled thoughts going through her head, but one eventually coming out on top. _This is going to be a long night._

In time though, she managed to drift back into sleep, the song and the heavenly voice she heard during her dream being replayed in her head.

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Songs used: _"All Through the Night"_- by Jules Shear

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**So there you have it, chapter three. Who is the mysterious man, and who is the dark woman Elsa saw in her dream? Don't make assumptions just yet, you may be surprised... but I still like theories. **

**One final note: With this chapter I have now depleted the number of pre-written chapters so now I actually need to write them from now on. In other words: updates will slow down. Not stop, just slow down. Sorry about that if that bothers anybody. But I do have (almost) everything planned out so it might go a little faster. **

**Anyway, please R.R.F.F. (Read, Review, Favorite, Follow)**

**-OrangeGalen**


	4. The Next Day

**Well, so much for the going faster part huh? Sorry but I got caught up with other stories then I had a good almost month and a half of writer's block that I'm barely just getting over with, plus college really screws over my writing motivation. And it's been two months(ish) since I've updated this, so here you go! I've learned now not to promise anything, but hopefully updates will be less than a month apart... maybe? Eh.**

**Whatever. Get on with it.**

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**Disclaimer: I do not own Frozen**

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_Daylight washes away the memories of the night, but their affects still cling to us long after we have regained consciousness._

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1863 Jan 1st Tuesday

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The next morning came too soon for Elsa. That statement probably applied to most of the people in Arendelle right then too, nursing hangovers from their late night festivities. Not that Elsa had anything to drink, it was just general tiredness. The sun streamed through her window, lighting up her room, showing no evidence of what happened that night. No ice or frost anywhere, not even the window, letting the sun shine through without interruption.

However that had an adverse effect on the room's sole occupant. As soon as the sun cleared the mountains, a beam of sunlight went directly into Elsa's face, startling her awake from her dreamless sleep. When she opened her eyes, she blinded herself looking into the light and groaned in pain and the knowledge that she lost all hope of going back to sleep. She rolled over and attempted to just that, but then she needed to scratch her feet. Sighing from frustration, she reached down under the sheets and scratched.

As soon as her hands touched her feet, she felt something brush off of them: something wet and cold. Curious, Elsa threw back the sheets and looked down at her feet, suddenly staring in shock. Her feet were covered in a fine layer of frost that was already disappearing from the sun's rays. But that wasn't the problem; Elsa had woken up before to a frozen room before, the icy crystals covering her body. No, it was because it was only on her feet, and that brought back the memory of her nightmare. She could almost feel the ice creeping up her legs right then, a ghost memory.

_What happened last night?_ Elsa wondered. _I know I was asleep, but the dream felt so real. Who was that woman I saw and how did she know so much about me? _The last of the ice on her feet disappeared and she flicked them to get the water off.

Elsa got up from her bed and looked around her room, trying to get her mind back into reality. She shook her head when she thought she saw a flash of a cloak, but there was nothing abnormal about her room. Even the ice that had completely engulfed her room last night was gone, thawed out somehow either by time or a strangely warm night. Not that Elsa remembered if it was or not, she had other things on her mind.

She placed her bare feet on the floorboards, enjoying the feel of the wood under her feet without any ice on the floor, then went over to her closet and pondered a moment what to wear for the day. "I'm not really going anywhere today," she said out loud to herself, "so I think something less elaborate would suit today well." She paused remembering something, "However, it is New Year's day today, so should I wear something a little more refined for that?"

After a bit of deliberation, Elsa decided to go for something a little more formal for today. She grabbed a black shirt that had green buttons and gold Rosemaling patterns, and put on a dark blue skirt with similar patterns. Thinking this enough, Elsa went over and started doing her hair, combing it and putting it into a braid, which she then wound around her head due to habit. Forced habit anyway.

Elsa went over to her mirror and looked at herself, slightly wincing at her face. She had slightly dark bags under her eyes and her body posture showed evidence of tiredness. She was slightly hunched over and her shoulders were drooping, completely not a royal posture and frankly Elsa didn't care all that much right then.

As she poked one of the bags under her eyes, she suddenly remembered something from last night. _Did I really see myself staring at myself from the mirror? Or rather my reflection staring?_ She frowned slightly and walked backwards, still looking at the mirror as her reflection duplicated her actions. She kept a close eye on her reflection, looking for any sign of a difference in movements. At one point she edged herself far enough over that her eyes were barely peaking in the mirror.

She then suddenly jumped towards the mirror and made a loud "Hah!" sound, trying to scare her reflection into doing something different. Obviously the mirror's reflection did the same thing as her and Elsa had practically ended up in the same spot she started off in.

"Huh, I guess I was just imagining things." Elsa said to her reflection. "You really didn't move on your own last night… did you?" Elsa waited a beat then said, "Of course you didn't. You're me… or my reflection anyway. You can't move without me. I control you, ha ha ha!" Elsa laughed jokingly and started making weird motions with her arms and watching her reflection copy her, totally not serious.

She suddenly spun around shocked when she swore she heard a chuckle behind her. Her eyes frantically looked around for any sign of the culprit, but she was confronted with an empty room. She spun back around facing the mirror and was confronted with her reflection staring wide eyed back at her, the same expression she had. _What was that? Did I really hear somebody? _

"Who are you? Where are you?" Elsa called out to her room. "Show yourself!"

Silence.

Elsa turned back to the mirror, her frown even more pronounced. Now she had even more things on her mind.

A sudden knocking on her door startled her yet again and she jumped a bit. She took a deep breath and calmed herself as best she could, preparing herself for her father. "Come in father."

The door opened and King Adgar came inside, dressed like a king. "Good morning Elsa, and happy New Year." He greeted her.

"And happy New Year to you too father." Elsa replied, her hands at her sides.

Her father gave a small smile and said, "Straighten up your posture Elsa. It's not fitting for a royal to slouch." The word slouch coming out of his mouth sounded unused and awkward.

Elsa instantly responded to her father's command and straightened out her back, standing much taller now. He gave a nod and looked around the room, examining it again. "No ice. That's good Elsa, seems that you are taking this to heart."

Elsa nodded. "I am trying father."

"That's all I ask for." He said turning to her, but then stopped. "Is something wrong?" He asked.

Elsa's eyes widened. _Does he know about what happened? No he couldn't have, stop being ridiculous Elsa._ "What do you mean?" She questioned.

"Your eyes have bags under them." He stated.

"Oh that. I didn't have a peaceful sleep last night." Elsa said truthfully.

Adgar frowned. "Did you stay up till midnight? You shouldn't do that, it's not fitting for a princess to stay up for some absurd reason. "

Elsa shook her head almost frantically. "No, I didn't. I just had a nightmare last night."

Adgar lost his frown and his eyes became concerned for a moment before they changed again. "Nightmares are only in your mind and are not real. Don't let them affect you."

"I know father." Elsa said, hiding the sadness in her voice. _He didn't even ask me what it was about…_

He smiled without showing teeth again, "Good. Now I'll send someone up with your breakfast shortly. Since you do not have any lessons for the next few days you'll stay in here. Is there anything you would like me to send you?" He asked.

Elsa thought about it. "There isn't really much. I've read most of the books here and I really can't think of anything else I can do."

There was a strange emotion on her father's face for a moment before it was shut down. "In that case, I'll send up some more books you can study. Since you don't have lessons doesn't mean you can't stop learning. I'll bring some with your breakfast."

Elsa curtsied and replied automatically, "Thank you father."

He just nodded and walked back out into the hallway, closing that familiar door behind her. Elsa sighed and went to the window again and looked out over Arendelle, or at least the city. There was still at least a foot or two of snow on the ground and there were a few clouds in the sky. The sun had risen higher and was now completely clear of the mountains. Arendelle was starting to wake up.

From her limited view of the town, Elsa could see a few people starting to go outside and shovel away the snow from their front doors. _Just like what the servants used to do after- no Elsa, stop thinking about that. Don't feel. Don't remember. It'll just hurt. _Elsa moved away from the window and was about to sit at her desk when she saw something on the floor. When she came closer, she realized it was the book she was reading, or attempting to read, last night. _I guess I never picked it up from when I dropped it. _Elsa bent down and picked it up and held it, a sudden thought coming into her mind. _Wasn't this completely frozen? If the ice melted then the book should be ruined. But it's not; it's completely fine._

Baffled, Elsa brought the book with her and sat down at her desk. With nothing better to do she opened it again. _No water marks at all. Completely different from what happened last time. The entire book was ruined and… father wasn't pleased…_ Elsa put the book down closed and looked around her room, much like her father just did.

_Where did my ice go? I froze my entire room last night. I shouldn't have, but it happened. So where is the ice? Not that I'm sad that it's gone but… _

She searched her mind for answers, but none came to her. She sighed slightly and sat straight at her desk. The book held no interest for her anymore and she left it on the desk. Elsa waited for her meal to come.

_Waiting. Waiting, watching the days go by. It seems that that has become my life now, interspaced between learning and studying and… lessons. How to conceal my curse. How to not let it show. How to control it so it won't escape. Seems pointless, but I need to stop it somehow, otherwise what happened to Anna could be repeated… and be worse. _

Elsa was jostled out of her thoughts when there was another knocking on the door that signified her father had returned. "Enter," Elsa said as she stood up from her desk.

The king came in carrying a large tray that had a small assortment of food and a small pile of books. "Here's your breakfast Elsa. I also took the liberty of getting a few language books for you."

"Thank you father." Elsa said and moved aside so he could place the tray on her desk.

When he did, he suddenly froze for a split second then stood up without facing her. "What is this Elsa?" He said. The way he said those four words sent shivers down Elsa's spine and made her take a step backwards unconsciously.

"What is what father?" She asked, trying to keep the shaking out of her voice.

"This." He turned around and lifted up his hand accusingly. Elsa saw that it was the book she had picked off the ground earlier. Elsa's eyes widened as she remembered the last time he found her reading a "pointless fantasy book".

"No, it's nothing. I just forgot to put it back when I pulled it out last night. I didn't read it, I swear." Elsa said frantically.

"You shouldn't even have this." Her father said. "It's not appropriate for a young princess to have her head in the clouds with false stories and fantasies. The real world isn't like this, Elsa. They don't believe in this and when they see it, they become afraid and fear it. It will make them do terrible things. Do you understand?" He finished, coming closer while he spoke, with Elsa backing up.

"Y-yes father." Elsa said, hanging her head submissively to prevent him from seeing the hurt and slight tinge of fear in her eyes.

He nodded and continued, "Read up on these books Elsa. I'll expect nothing less from you." He paused. "I'll send lunch up at twelve-thirty and dinner at six. The trays will be picked up at seven."

Elsa nodded in understanding, "Alright."

"Don't say 'alright', say understood." He told her.

Elsa tried to prevent the sigh that was forming in defeat. "Understood." She said weakly.

"Good." He still had the book in his hand as he started towards the door. Just as he was about to open it, he said over his shoulder, "I love you Elsa."

Elsa gave a very small smile at that. "I love you to father."

Adgar went out the door and closed it behind him. Elsa closed her eyes and took a deep stabilizing breath, but before she could let it out, she heard two voices out in the hallway start talking to each other.

_"Anna, leave your sister alone."_ Elsa's eyes widened as she realized who her father must have run into outside.

_"But I want to play with her."_ Elsa's nine-year-old younger sister said on the other side of the door.

_"Elsa has had a tiring night Anna, she just wants to rest." _

_"Well, maybe she wants to talk about it." _Anna said.

_"Anna please,"_ her father's voice was starting to get agitated, _"Elsa wants to be alone right now. She just told me so."_

_ No I didn't. _

_"Let's go eat breakfast with your mother." _Adgar said.

_"Doesn't Elsa want to eat with us?" _

_"No she doesn't. She asked for her meal to be taken inside her room. Let's go Anna." _

_"But-"_

_"No Anna,"_ her father cut her off, _"just leave her be."_

_"…Okay." _Came Anna's unhappy reply and Elsa heard two sets of footsteps walk away and eventually fade into silence.

Elsa let go the breath that she didn't realize she was holding in. As she did so, it almost came out as a sob. It broke her little by little every time Anna needed to be turned away from her door. Sometimes Elsa had enough strength to do so herself, to speak to her sister, those three words that crushed her every time she said them. Other times Elsa couldn't and she'd listen to Anna attempt to talk to her through the door, without her answering, until somebody came by and shooed the princess away.

But she would keep coming back and the situation would replay itself.

Elsa slid down to the floor with her back against the foot of the bed. "Why?" She asked aloud. "Why did this happen to me? Why was I born like this? Why couldn't I be normal?"

She glanced over and saw that her mirror was angled in a way that she could see her reflection. And she looked terrible. Her eyes once just had bags under them. Now they were red as well with the hint of tears in them. Her hair was partially disheveled somehow, and her body was trembling slightly, trying to keep her emotions and her curse in.

The temperature in the room started dropping and Elsa curled in on herself. "No, conceal it, don't feel, _don't_ feel. Keep it together Elsa. Don't let them know." _Don't let papa know. _

She stayed like that for a few minutes and she eventually calmed down a bit. The temperature stopped dropping and there was no ice anywhere, so Elsa figured that was an improvement. She stood up and went over to the desk where her food was. Unfortunately it was cold but Elsa shrugged internally and made sure her gloves were properly on first before she ate. Elsa ate her breakfast in relative silence and kept her mind from wandering. _Because if it does, then who knows what could happen._

After she was done, she decided that she might as well read the books her father brought in. They were all foreign language books: French, German, Swedish, and strangely Irish Gaelic as one of the choices. "Don't know why that's one of the books we have. I'm surprised it even got off the British Isles." She was familiar through history books how 'unfriendly' the British were to the Scottish and Irish but she didn't really mind. It was their business, not hers or Arendelle's.

Elsa shrugged, "Oh well, might start off with something familiar. Swedish should do. And then maybe German." She grabbed the Swedish language book and began reading. She would read a chapter, then practice working on the pronunciation and tonal variations. Afterwards she would then write down everything she learned and translated it into Norwegian, then took something and translated it into Swedish.

It took a lot of self-discipline driven into her for her to manage this, but she continuously did it. For lack of a better reason, there was nothing else to do. She had read the small collection of books that she had in her room several times over. She had counted everything in her room that could be counted. She stared out the window for hours upon hours when she had time. There was _literally nothing_ to do except study. So that's what Elsa did.

Years she had spent perfecting everything she had learned. Math? Favorite part was geometry. History? Knew everything about every ruler of Arendelle since it's foundation seven hundred and sixty eight years ago. Sciences, Politics, and languages were all the same. Elsa was well on her way to becoming a prodigy.

But the reason for that was because she was pushed so. Her days were filled with endless tutoring and studying. Her parents, her father especially, considered that any moment spent not learning or memorizing something was wasted. Consequences could be… harsh.

So Elsa pushed herself to the breaking point to learn everything that was expected of her. She would be the good girl and do everything she was told to do. It wasn't as if she had a choice anyway; her powers kept her in line, making sure that not one toe was out of place otherwise she would never hear the end of it.

And that's how Elsa spent most of her days, her years. Alone in her room with only her curse, her books, her lessons, and her mirror.

* * *

The day passed by and Elsa had barely moved from her seat. She had read the Swedish book through and was now re-reading it again just to make sure she had everything. Part of her desk had several pieces of paper on it that were filled with writings Elsa had done as she practiced. Lunch and Dinner had been served to her and the trays had been taken away promptly at seven, like her father said. So the first day of the New Year had passed, much like the last day of the old year had.

Once Elsa reached a certain point, she stopped reading and stretched out her body, feeling a few joints and muscles cracking from being in the same position for a long time. "Ah, that felt good." Elsa said to herself. She pushed back the chair and stood up and walked around the room, getting her legs to work again.

"Is it too early to go to bed now? It might make the day go past faster. But I'm not really that tired yet, which is somewhat surprising since I was up at the late hours of the night." She stopped once again in front of her full-length mirror and stared at herself.

"Of course, that was because of the nightmare I had."

"What was that anyway? I can't make heads or tails out of it whichever way I look at it. It felt real, but dreams do that to you and it couldn't have been real anyway. It's impossible."

"But so is having an ice curse on me." Elsa fell silent again, out arguing herself again.

"No, dreams can't come true," Elsa said. "It wasn't real. It was just my brain, having two nightmares in a row. That's all."

"Oh boy, it sounds like I'm trying to convince myself of that. Why am I so reluctant? It makes no sense," Elsa said in finality. "It was a dream-slash-nightmare, and it absolutely wasn't real. End of story, goodbye, the end, that's it." She turned away from the mirror and just looked at her room.

A sudden knock jolted her out of her staring contest with her room. _"Your highness? Are you there?"_ A feminine voice said from the other side.

_Of course I'm here. Where else would I be?_ Elsa thought. "Yes? What is it Gerda?" She called out.

_"I'm here to take your dirty dishes, you highness."_ Gerda answered.

Elsa went over and opened the door slightly, "One moment please," she said to the servant on the other side. Elsa bent down and, making sure her gloves were on, picked up the pile of dishes that she had put on the trays. She had put the dishes there knowing she would have to bring them out come time for them to be picked up.

She opened the door a little bit more so she could pass them through to Gerda. "Thank you." She said.

"Your welcome Princess." The older women said as she took the pile. "Is there anything else you require?"

"No there is not." Elsa said.

"Very well. Goodnight your highness." She said giving as much of a bow as she could, then left down the hallway.

Elsa closed the door, knowing that that was the last time she would talk to anybody that day… _Well, anybody besides myself that is_. She sat back down at her desk and mindlessly flipped through the Swedish book again. She already had everything memorized and practiced, so she really didn't need to have the book anymore.

"I could always start one of the other ones." She said aloud. "German sounds like the next one to start." Elsa paused, thinking. "Isn't mama's sister the queen of a kingdom there? Yes, Corona, I remember now. I'll start reviewing my German next." Elsa said.

She reached out and was about to grab the book when she stopped and put her hand back in her lap. She frowned in sudden confusion. "Why did I do that? I want to look at the German language book. So why didn't I?" She shrugged and tried again, but her hand only twitched this time. "Okay… I don't feel any different? Why the sudden change?" She reflected inwardly and came to a conclusion, "I don't want to?" It came out as a question more than a statement. "But I do… and I don't? Huh."

She tried once more and weakly grabbed the book and brought it to her. She opened it and began reading. "I guess it was just a momentary thing then," she reasoned. She began translating it internally and working out the diction and wording. It was written in part German, part English, which Elsa had no problem reading since English was her close second language. Aside from Norwegian, English was used quite commonly, making Elsa bi-lingual at an early age. Anna also was this way as well.

_Stop it,_ Elsa thought, trying to squash the feeling of despair coming over her, which she knew would make her curse go haywire. _Don't think about Anna. You can't afford to. Don't feel. _Elsa closed her eyes in concentration, trying to keep in the ice that threatened to come out. Even though she had the gloves on, they wouldn't help if a powerful outburst came.

It worked barely. As Elsa opened her eyes, she saw that her gloves had frosted over. _Well at least it wasn't anything else,_ she thought. She stood up and went over to a wastebasket and shook her gloves a few times to get the ice crystals off of the gloves. Once that was done, she went back and started reading again.

Elsa would read that book for hours as her eyelids started drooping lower, and lower, and lower…

* * *

_She was in an open courtyard which she recognized as the one outside the castle. The fountain was sparkling in the sunlight and Elsa allowed herself a rare smile at the sight. There was a soft breeze that felt refreshing to her. Elsa took a deep breath and filled her lungs up with this air. She slowly brought her arms and hands up as well, feeling the breeze through the fabric of her clothing. _

_Elsa closed her eyes and held that position, just enjoying being outside for once. She slowly exhaled and felt better. _

_Until she heard a scream. _

_Elsa's eyes shot open and looked for the source of the screaming. There was a woman about ten meters in front of Elsa, her eyes were wide with fear. _

How did she get there? _Elsa thought. _She wasn't there before.

_Elsa brushed that thought away and refocused on why the woman was screaming. She followed her eye line until it reached the point she was staring at. _

Me.

_Elsa looked to her sides and gasped. The fountain in the center of the courtyard had frozen into a deadly tower of icicles, glimmering ominously now. Elsa looked to her left and saw that the entire wall on that side and been encased in ice with several icicle spikes pointing dangerously outwards. _

_She then noticed that both her hands were still outstretched. And both were being held in the direction of where the frozen creations were. Elsa's eyes widened in realization. _

I did that.

_The woman was still screaming, but now it was words instead of mindless sounds. "Witch! Witch! Monster! Sorceress! Monster!" _

_Elsa's eyes became clouded with fear and she started walking backwards. The woman started advancing, still screaming. _

_"No, please, stay away." Elsa said, her hands coming up to tell the person to back off. But as soon as she did so, her ice shot off again and impacted the women directly in the chest. _

_It took less than a second for her to turn to solid ice, her accusing finger still pointing at Elsa. _

_No. _

No.

_"No." Elsa whispered. _

_The sky started to darken and snowflakes started to fall. _

_"Monster!" Elsa spun around and saw a mob of people on the steps leading to the castle. All of them were staring at her with hate in their eyes. _

_"Wait, please, I didn't mean-" Elsa started. _

_"Witch! Monster! Kill her!"_

_Elsa scrambled backwards in fear and tried to get away, but her legs wouldn't work. She turned around and stumbled, falling. She could hear the mob getting closer, but then another voice came over everything. _

_"I'm disappointed in you Elsa." _

_Elsa looked up into the hate filled eyes of her father. "I thought I'd told you to conceal your powers. To not feel. But you failed. Now look." He said gesturing around. _

_Elsa reluctantly looked and gasped again. The entire mob had been frozen solid. Some were still in the position of running, with one foot on the ground, perfectly balanced. They all shared a look of frozen horror on their faces. _

When did I do that?

_"No, I didn't mean to. It was an accident." Elsa said, her voice breaking. _

_"Is that what you call it? An accident? Boy, I'd hate to see what it'll look like when you do it intentionally. Oh wait, I have." A new voice broke in. One painfully familiar. _

_Elsa turned and saw Anna coming towards her. The white streak in her hair was growing, turning her red hear into a silver-white. "And let me tell you, it's not quick and definitely not painless." _

_"Anna." Elsa whispered. _

_"Oh, so you do remember me? Funny, I thought that you had forgotten because I haven't seen you in four years." _

_"I didn't mean-"_

_"No, you did. And now look. I'm freezing to death." A cold chuckle escaped from Anna's lips. "And let me tell you something, it's not pleasant. I can literally feel the ice taking over and freezing me. It's extremely painful. And you did this to me."_

_"No, I didn't…" Elsa croaked out, now curled up on herself. _

_"Yes you did! I'm frozen, look at me!" Anna said gleefully. Then she stood stock still and froze. _

_"NOOOOOOOO! ANNA!" Elsa cried out and rushed forward to do anything, give anything to have her sister back. But a hand shot out and grabbed her before she could go anywhere. _

_"Look at what you have done Elsa." Her father whispered in her ear. "Your own sister, your people, and your kingdom. You destroyed it all. And what do you feel? Nothing close to what you should be feeling." He shoved her and she landed painfully on the ground, her wrist hurting now. _

_"I guess everything I did for you was pointless. You are an unfeeling monster Elsa." _

_"No. I can't. I don't- I don't…" _

_"You. Are. A. Monster." Each word was like a nail getting hammered into her chest. _

_"No. No. No. No. No." Elsa kept repeating over and over again. _

_"And do you know what happens to monsters?" _

_"No. No. No. No. No…" _

_"They are killed." _

_There was a sound of steel being unsheathed and Elsa couldn't bear to look. She couldn't anyway. _

It's true. I am a monster.

_There was a swooshing sound and Elsa felt something come across her back. There was a white hot pain and she slowly started loosing feeling throughout her body. Tears came out of her eyes from the pain. _

_"Well then. That ends that." There was the sound of retreating footsteps and then silence except for the jagged breathing of Elsa that was becoming weaker and weaker. _

Mama, Papa, Anna, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

_Elsa closed her eyes and waited for the end and the blackness to overtake her. She could feel no more. _

_…_

_…_

_…_

_A soft voice started singing and even though the voice was quiet, it could be heard everywhere and by everyone. _

_~"Golden slumbers kiss your eyes, _

_Smiles await you when you rise._

_Sleep, pretty darling_

_Do not cry_

_And I will sing a lullaby."~_

_ Elsa opened an eye, and was surprised that she could do so. _

_That voice. It sounds familiar. _

_Feeling started coming back into her body and the sky started getting clearer. The voice grew in strength but still retained its tenderness. _

_~"Cares you know not, _

_Therefore sleep,_

_While over you a watch I'll keep. _

_Sleep, pretty darling_

_Do not cry_

_And I will sing a lullaby."~_

_A bright light suddenly overtook everything and Elsa closed her eyes to block it out. The world vanished and Elsa felt at peace with herself._

* * *

Elsa shot up with a start, knocking over the book that was on her desk. She breathed heavily for a few moments before she regained control over her senses. Her eyes looked around before she realized that she was still at her desk.

"Wha-what just happened?" Elsa asked out loud. She felt the side of her face, which was a little numb, and came to a conclusion. "I must have fallen asleep while reading. And had another nightmare while at it." She rubbed her face with her right hand and winced, suddenly holding her wrist in pain.

"Ow." Not much could be said about it. After the pain flared down, Elsa rotated her wrist around to get some feeling into it. "It hurts slightly from when I f-"! She cut herself off as she realized what finishing that sentence meant. "No. It couldn't have… I must have been resting it in a weird position. That has to be it. Yes, that is the only explanation." She said, trying to convince herself.

She stood up shakily, her legs protesting against the movement. _I must have been asleep longer than I thought, it's completely dark out now. I guess I should actually go to sleep in my bed now._ Elsa got changed into her blue nightdress and was about to get into bed when she stopped, feeling something different in the room.

She spun around and blue eyes met blue eyes.

_It's that man from before! _

The man was standing up this time in the shadows next to the far wall. His cape hung over him, further melting his figure into the dark room. But his blue eyes shone through this, like lights in the distance.

Before Elsa could react the man was gone again; vanished faster than you could blink, leaving an afterimage of him behind.

Elsa could only stand there and try to comprehend what she saw.

_What. _

_Was. _

That?

Elsa went over to the spot the man was at and found nothing, not even a footprint this time. _Who is he? Why do I keep seeing him, especially after my nightmares? What does he want? Is he even real?_ These questions once again raced through Elsa's mind with no answers available.

She yawned, cutting her frantic train of thought off. _Whoa, that was a yawn. I guess I am tired. He hasn't done anything and I don't think he's real. I should just ignore him when I see him. Hopefully he'll, or it, will go away._

Elsa once again went over to the bed and got in. A few minutes later she was sound asleep, at peace with the world.

* * *

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

* * *

Songs used: _Golden Slumber_ (have no clue who it's actually by. It's not me!)

* * *

**So, that's the long awaited fourth chapter! Hope it was worth the wait! This turned out a bit longer than the other ones but I'm happy! And like Elsa, it's time for me to go to bed as well. It's ten minutes till 12 right now for me and I'm half ****asleep myself.**

**So, yet another nightmare, another lullaby, and another visit from that man in the shadows. True tension is not yet, but will be getting there. **

**Until next time, Read, Review, Favorite, Follow. (R.R.F.F)**

**-OrangeGalen**


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